The process of growing up starts off small, with things like Barney. I was one of those kids who are old before their time, always worried about where Barney appeared from and anxious about the baby in the Teletubbies' sun (I always wondered how it wasn't burning, since it was laughing)
There comes a time when being grown up is sleeping in a separate room and being allowed to sleepovers. It's ordering your own food for the first time. It's when not wanting to sleep when you're supposed to morphs into wanting to sleep when you're not supposed to. For me, growing up was being pulled away from my favorite books to another set of books that were never as captivating but are apparently more necessary.
Growing up is going from giggling at sex scenes in books to reading Stieg Larsson without batting an eyelash, but never losing your belief in magic. It's understanding Harper Lee on a whole new level and discovering untold giants like Asimov and Zusak.
When you figure out you'll never look like her (at least on the outside) and give up, you think you've grown up. But really growing up is realising that it doesn't matter and trying to make your inside beautiful instead. I haven't grown up this way yet. I wonder if I ever will.
Growing up is when your parents finally listen to your opinion like it matters. But often it's about realising that your parents are flawed too. This sort of creeps up on you. I don't remember when it happened. But suddenly finding yourself on equal footing with them is scary and unsettling and thrilling all at the same time.
People think growing up is about becoming adequate. But in almost eighteen years I have never felt adequately grown up, and I don't think I ever will.
To me, growing up isn't about losing that feeling of inadequacy.
It's about realising that you never will.
Have I, then, grown up?
Maybe.
There comes a time when being grown up is sleeping in a separate room and being allowed to sleepovers. It's ordering your own food for the first time. It's when not wanting to sleep when you're supposed to morphs into wanting to sleep when you're not supposed to. For me, growing up was being pulled away from my favorite books to another set of books that were never as captivating but are apparently more necessary.
Growing up is going from giggling at sex scenes in books to reading Stieg Larsson without batting an eyelash, but never losing your belief in magic. It's understanding Harper Lee on a whole new level and discovering untold giants like Asimov and Zusak.
When you figure out you'll never look like her (at least on the outside) and give up, you think you've grown up. But really growing up is realising that it doesn't matter and trying to make your inside beautiful instead. I haven't grown up this way yet. I wonder if I ever will.
Growing up is when your parents finally listen to your opinion like it matters. But often it's about realising that your parents are flawed too. This sort of creeps up on you. I don't remember when it happened. But suddenly finding yourself on equal footing with them is scary and unsettling and thrilling all at the same time.
People think growing up is about becoming adequate. But in almost eighteen years I have never felt adequately grown up, and I don't think I ever will.
To me, growing up isn't about losing that feeling of inadequacy.
It's about realising that you never will.
Have I, then, grown up?
Maybe.
